today was the last day of the funeral. as the prayers were carried out, some cried. i went round the coffin three last times. i cried. she seemed so cold lying in there. the band start playing and all. after that followed behind the coffin van. i was like crying. then sat the bus to Mandai Crematorium. sighs. on the way there, it was so quiet. except for the cries of some of my relatives. when we reach there, we went into this room which looks like a church. with the coffin at the front and the benches at the back. most people started crying. we took off the piece of cloth at our sleeve and put it on the coffin. i tried not to cry at that time. then we went to the viewing hall where the coffin will be cremated. we were at a higher level and the only thing that separated us from grandma was a glass. as the coffin was being pushed in, my aunties called out for my grandma. my cousin called out too. and i started crying. the coffin was slowly pushed to the room at the opposite. it was computerised. the coffin went slowly. and we cried out more. i couldnt help it. in that one minute or so, most people cried. everyone called out for grandma. as the coffin was pushed in to that room, we all cried louder. the door closed. that was the end. i wont see grandma face again. i wont see her forever again. sighs. i remembered the times when she called my house asking for my mother. and she'll always ask who am i. i'll never hear her voice again. not anymore. after the door closed, we were supposed to leave the hall. and my mother dont wanna leave. she cried more. she sat on the floor, like a small child who lost her mother. it was the first time i seen her like that. i couldnt hold back my tears at all. my eyes were all red. most of my relatives' eyes were red too. sighs. then we went back to the funeral site.

after that i went home. and i slept. cause i was so damn tired. i just wished to see you.

♥ Tuesday, October 31, 2006
8:42 PM